I have some wise clients who teach people, often women, how to pursue their big mission in the world. Some of the advice is about being visible, putting yourself forward, demonstrating in tangible ways that you believe in your own worth. I listen, and incorporate as much as I can.

The other day I had workmen here repairing my ceiling. One of the guys said he’d be back the next day to finish the sanding and make it perfect. I was about to say, “Oh, don’t bother. We don’t care about things like that.”

I stopped myself.

It got me thinking. In what ways do I shortchange myself and send a message that I don’t want to be sending. It’s true that my husband and I are not house proud. I like hand me downs and bargains. I don’t really pay attention to things.

Should I?

What tangible things in my life need to be high quality, first rate, shiny and new, and what’s fine funky and used? What part of paying attention to appearances is true to myself? What am I tolerating out of inertia and what is simply not important?

Would my spirit be brightened if I got rid of the flatware I got from my ex in 1978? What difference would matching dishes make in my life? (or towels or sheets?) What would I be trading?

I think there is something important here and I will be exploring this edge.

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