I just saw a video excerpt from America’s Got Talent. I don’t often pay attention to those but this one really moved me. It started when Courtney Hadwin walked onstage as an shy, gawky, very ordinary seeming 13-year old girl who then transformed into a fully-commited Janis Joplin for the new millenium. I’m still feeling the emotion of seeing her explode with so much passion.

I want to be that willing to give everything, leave nothing in reserve, be fully out there, exposed.

As a step in that direction, I’ve signed up for a master class in improvisational singing. I want to learn to scat like Ella. How does one manage to sing “doodly dwee bop um BWOW” without being self-conscious? I’m hoping to learn.

When I think about putting it all out there, I generally mean in the context of performing. I’ve occasionally stepped out of my protective shell, but more often I feel like the daughter of an English Quaker lady, but with the heart of a ham. I want to be bold but feel a lot of resistance to calling attention to myself.

Being that free takes a lot of commitment. I picture commitment to that degree as a level of intensity that you can dial up. Courtney certainly cranked it to 11! I probably hang out around 5 or 6.

What would it mean if we turned up the volume, the heat, the willingness, in other areas of life?